I saw my future wife the other day. So that’s exciting.
You probably want to know how we met. Interesting story…
actually, this is kind of awkward, we haven’t. Yet. But we will; I’m certain of it (riiight).
I saw her though and I knew it was meant to be (like in a duct tape kind of way?). It wasn’t in the store (oh good, at least those women are safe). It was on TV (of course it was). But don’t worry, I’m not going to do anything crazy like drive to her location and try to meet her (all my fears are relieved…). I’m just going to plan a way to “randomly” bump into her (that’s so much better).
I mean, it can’t be that hard to meet a celebrity, right? They’re normal people (with bodyguards, rabid fans, and paparazzi). Is it so bad to try and meet one (for an autograph, no; for dinner and a movie, the jury’s going to have to determine that)?
All I need to do is make her smile and laugh; if I can do that, she’ll definitely like me (wow, okay, time to wash my hands of this weirdness). So I’ll– (know what, no, I can’t sit idly by and watch you ruin someone’s life…even for a moment. Time to tie you up and see how you like it [for how long?] as long as it takes.
In the meantime, dear readers, take a gander at the interesting tags that’ve been suggested.)