I hope you’ve finalized all your arrangements. It’s finally here, the end of the world. It’s snowing, so clearly the apocalypse begins with people forgetting how to drive. But there’s got to be more to it than that.
Call off work, people. Spend time with your loved ones. We’ve only got a few moments left. The end is upon us!
Make haste to fortify your homes. Who knows what form the end might take. Zombie apocalypse, alien invasion, spontaneous rapture. All are likely. There’s a small city in France that thinks aliens will come out of their mountain. Who are we to say differently? Earthquakes, tornadoes, floods, locusts? What’s going to happen?
It’s all so terrifying…and exciting! It’s terribly exciting. It’s excitingly terrifying. It’s exrifying or terriciting. Exterring? Terrexying? Whatever it is, it’s happening today!
Sharpen your swords, board up your windows, pick up your hammers, lock your doors, be prepared for anything. The end is nigh! The end is nigh!