Remember when television used to replace all the profanity with different words instead of just muting them (some still do)? They’re usually good for a laugh. …Or two.
My brother’s all-time favorite is from when we were little and watching an 80’s movie (were they ever not awesomely bad?)…Robocop or something. Every time someone swore, it was replaced with “viking”. So it was “viking this” and “viking that” or “this stupid viking thing”.
There are plenty floating out there, however.
Instead of taking the Lord’s name in vain (and not breaking the
second commandment third commandment), I’ve heard “cheese and rice”.
Some of my friends use “harsh letters” like, “F this” or “that stupid B”. It’s a fairly common practice.
There are, however, plenty of ways to get around swearing. I usually bite my tongue, literally. As George Washington said, “The foolish and wicked practice of profane cursing and swearing is a vice so mean and low that every person of sense and character detests and despises it.”
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/swearing.html#kDjC7gB2F2AV0vYp.99
But, that doesn’t mean we won’t ever curse. Even if our first president tells us not to. But, sometimes, we do need to modify our language…like when we’re on TV. I’m sure you’ll be able to figure most of these out.
Why not use Oedipus or, if you want to keep the same number of syllables, Oedipus Rex (too intellectual?)?
Here’s a good one from my high school Latin class (yes, I took Latin in high school, not much use now though): fish feces.
War ship is always a good choice. Ship in general is pretty common.
As is saying donkey.
If worse comes to worse, just watch TV (not a movie channel) and pick up a few choice words for your next trip to the library or that next adventure in babysitting.