Golden Rule Loophole

We all know the golden rule: “Treat others how you want to be treated” or “Love your neighbor as yourself”.  And that’s great, but there are a few people who just don’t make the cut.

Like, the guy who borrows my stuff and never returns it.  The guy who consistently wants to borrow my stuff.  The neighbor who comes over while I’m grilling to “see my new porch” but is really looking for a free meal.  Rude customers at the store.  People who don’t know how to drive, but still do.  Those who text and drive (um, just buy a Ford and use the Sync system; it’ll text for you, duh).  Lazy co-workers (because I want to be lazy, too).  Drivers who don’t yield the right-of-way to pedestrians at a crosswalk.  Drivers who don’t stop at stop signs.  Of course, the list could go on.

The point is, how can I get away with treating them the way they should be treated (read: the way I want to) and yet keep the golden rule?

Loophole: Treat myself poorly and treat others just as badly.

I think I’m on to something, here.  I already have fairly low self-esteem (who doesn’t?).  Why not just lower it a bit more and subject myself to verbal abuse when looking into the mirror?  That way, I won’t need to stifle the taunts and insults I wish to fling at those who are less than ideal human beings neighbors and drivers.  What’s the harm in treating myself badly if I get to treat others just as badly?

It’s win-win.  (Except you really have to treat yourself poorly; refusing to buy yourself the last Twilight movie doesn’t count.)

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About bkreuch

I like to read, I like to write, and I like to make people laugh.
This entry was posted in Humor and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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